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Isn't it pretty?

Wednesday, December 01, 2004

Can We Look Beyond the Mirror?

Many people, myself especially, talk a lot about how the external should not matter, that what is inside is what really counts. Then why is it that I know so many people, women especially, who are extremely intelligent, accomplished, caring, independent, and otherwise incredible, who do not feel worthy because they feel they are not "beautiful"? I am absolutely not exempt from this - I have a lot of self-esteem about the fact that I work hard, I do well in school and can keep up with most people I know mentally, I am a person who truly cares about others. But when it comes to the way I look, I don't know if I will ever feel that I am good enough. And I hear this over and over from so many people, and like I said, especially from women.

I don't judge others for how they look, so why do I judge myself so harshly? Why do I think other people care more about my size and outward appearance than what is inside? I should love myself for who I am, not what I look like, but sometimes I have to admit that I find it difficult.

It saddens me when I hear people talk about wanting to lose weight - not to be healthy, but to be thin, no matter what cost. I heard of some acquaintances yesterday who are on the following diet - coffee, cigarettes, a Power Bar and a "lite" dinner. What is the point of that? To be so thin that you pass out the minute you stand up? That doesn't seem like it could possibly be especially attractive. We compartmentalize our value into different aspects of ourselves. Why do we let our self-esteem, high and stable in other respects, falter when we look in the mirror?

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