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Isn't it pretty?

Thursday, May 20, 2004

I don't get it

I don't want to make this a blog focused on complaining about dating, but I just don't get it. People I know are constantly telling me how much they would like to see me get married, soon. But when it comes down to actually giving me the opportunity to meet single guys, the Orthodox world seems to make it incredibly difficult. How am I supposed to find guys I am interested in when I am not allowed to sit at a Shabbos table with single guys? Why must I only be invited alongside other girls? What is wrong with single men and women having a nice meal together at the house of a married couple? Recently, some people here in Baltimore started an organization, Segulah, with the mission of bringing marriage-minded singles together at a Shabbos table. The thought was that if you met someone you were interested in, great! If not, you could always keep the people you met in mind for your friends. I thought it was a great idea. Unfortunately, those who put Segulah together are leaving Baltimore, and as far as I know, no one has stepped in to take their place in coordinating the program. What I don't understand is why it takes an organization to do something like this. I assume that most couples, being made up of a male and a female, know both singles guys and girls. Why don't they invite them at the same time? At 26 years old, I think I am mature enough to sit at a table and carry on a conversation with a male, whether I am interested in him or not. I think I know better than any shadchan what I am looking for in a guy, and I will probably recognize it when I see it in person, rather than during a conversation with a reference who is undoubtedly going to give me a description of the guy that makes him sound like every other guy out there. I think it is time to give singles who are assumed to be ready for marriage a little credit for being able to handle being in the same room with people of the opposite sex. Instead of worrying so much about setting up two people you barely know, go ahead and introduce them and see what happens! Okay, ranting over. Sorry about that.


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