The Similarities Between Dating and Blogging

Over Shabbos, I was musing about how blogging and dating are similar. Let's explore.

In dating, you see someone who seems attractive. You start to talk, and find them interesting, maybe find some things you have in common with them.

In blogging, you browse the blogs until a certain title or template looks cool. You start to read, find them interesting, maybe find some thoughts you have in common with them.

In dating, you start out formal, putting on a brave face, being on best behavior, dressing up, doing your hair and makeup, being extremely careful about what you reveal.

In blogging, you often start out being extremely careful not to reveal who you really are. You are circumspect, only publishing your best, most carefully crafted thoughts. You edit and edit to have the perfect post.

In dating, as you get to know each other, you reveal more and more. You start to rely on the other person, opening up to them, showing them your true colors. You look forward to seeing the other person, missing them when you are not together. You start to show true emotion in front of them, both happiness and sadness.

In blogging, you start to build your own blog community with regular readers and commenters. As you get more comfortable with those who read and comment on your blog, you get more real, more open. You may start to expose more of yourself, even possibly revealing your true identity (for those who start out anonymous). You come to look forward to blogging, to writing posts and receiving feedback. You miss it when you can't access your computer for a time. It becomes a support in your life.

In dating, hopefully, you really build a deep relationship with the other person, making them a big part of your life. In blogging, maybe you do so as well, exchanging e-mail, phone calls and maybe even meeting other bloggers in real life.

Sometimes, the outcome is even the same.

The other thing that I find the same in dating and blogging is where, at least for a while, you are only seeing certain sides of a person, but not the whole person. It takes a long time to get the whole picture. It's one of my frustrations with both venues - people think they know who I am by reading my blog, or going out with me briefly. And they definitely attribute things to me that aren't there, because of their own biases. But it takes time, and a lot of exposure to really see who I am. Who anyone really is.

There ya have it - dating and blogging - one and the same.